Practical Shadow Work for Leaders
What is Shadow Work?
The terms “shadow“ and “shadow work“ were coined by Carl Gustav Jung, a Swiss psychiatrist, psychoanalyst and psychologist, in the beginning of the 20th century. It is so simple as the work with the opposites or polarity in our character. Often times the culture we live and grow up in is polarising, teaching us that for example “being strong is good“ and “being weak is bad“, or things like “ as a girl you shouldn’t…” or “as a boy, you should…“. Especially as kids, we are vulnerable to these kind of rules, and we strive to be good and fit in. This leads to suppression of certain traits and qualities with ourselves. Not only negative, but also our talents and gifts. These parts of ourselves that we suppress become our shadow.
Shadow work is about making our immature traits mature. It is not about having bad or good sides, because really what is it? Anger might be healthy if it is used to create a positive change in the world, but it could also be destructive and ruin relationships. It is more helpful to our personalities to strive for awareness of one’s own traits and use the whole spectra of skills and emotions in a productive and meaningful way.
“Shadow work is not about ‘fixing’ yourself — it’s about reclaiming the energy and wisdom hidden in the parts of you that you’ve pushed away. Each insight is a step toward wholeness.”
Mechanism behind and our behaviours
The shadow can be subtle and show up in our thought or behavioural patterns. That email that you never send, the smile that you force when you want to say no, the judgement that you carry towards someone that is really about what you don’t allow yourself. These can be your shadow at play. It can also show up in the most unexpected moments as a burst of anger or tears.
Here are some most common ways for the shadow to show up in:
Overdoing. For example, a leader who is being overly controlling or micromanagement might be hiding insecurity, fear of failure or vulnerability. ON the other hand, someone who is people pleasing to an unhealthy degree might be suppressing own needs which later builds a resentment.
Projecting onto others. A projection means that you are seeing a trait in someone else that you carry yourself, but do not acknowledge it. For example, if you feel like you are criticising or judging others for being expressive, maybe you are suppressing your own self-expression and do not allow yourself to be seen.
Overreacting - the intensity of the emotion can points towards something suppressed that was not expressed fully. It could really be any emotion.
Self-sabotage like miss deadlines or procrastinate to suppress a deeper fear or other emotions.
Avoidance. For example, avoiding or not allowing yourself success or intimacy from a deeper held belief of not being worthy of success and love. Or think about something that you secretly want. Down below I will share one of my secret desires and how I worked with it through shadow work.
Triggers. Emotional triggers can be carrying residues of the past when we disallowed ourselves to feel and express what we experienced in the moment.
A book tips: Was That Really Me?: How Everyday Stress Brings Out Our Hidden Personality
Why leaders should engage in shadow work?
Here are 5 reasons to engage in Shadow work:
Your capacity to hold diversity will increase
You will become better at handling conflicts
Experience less anxiousness and fear - emotions are contagious and therefore your team will also feel better
Freeingng up more energy and capacity
Your capacity for complexity and unknowns increases
As a leader, you carry a responsibility and you have a big impact on work and lives of others. A leader, who is unaware and suppresses their own shadow, risks to create a psychologically unsafe environment for others. For example, a paper “How Leaders' Expressions of Anger Affect Employees' Work Engagement” https://dl.acm.org/doi/abs/10.1145/3551690.3551706 explores how anger can decrease the motivation of the employees. And also how instead emotions like anger, frustration and sadness can be a catalyst for a positive organisational change, when used wisely: https://doi.org/10.1108/S1746-979120220000018012.
“ One of the criticisms I’ve faced over the years is that I’m not aggressive enough or assertive enough, or maybe somehow, because I’m empathetic, I’m weak. I totally rebel against that. I refuse to believe that you cannot be both compassionate and strong.”
My secret desire and shadow work
I promised to share my secret desire and how I worked with it. In this part, I’ll give you tools and examples of how you can uncover and work with your shadow — and how to turn it into an ally.
In the beginning of my entrepreneurial journey, I had an intense drive to fast-propel my business forward. I carried so much energy and determination, but if I’m honest, it was fueled by fear of failure. I carried a belief that “fast is good” and the word slow didn’t even exist in my vocabulary.
This belief led me into bursts of productivity: big launches, new offers, and sudden waves of delivery. But there was no consistency. It was all explosions of energy. Despite all the effort, this strategy didn’t create the results I was aiming for.
Then one night, I had a dream. And really, you don’t have to rely on dreams to do shadow work, but they can reveal a lot.
In the dream, I was driving a car. I was going fast and I also knew that I just started learning how to drive. I kept crashing it over and over again. Each time, I came out alive, jumped back in, and drove like crazy again till the car was completely demolished.
When I woke up, I took a moment to acknowledge what I had seen. The dream was a mirror: I was driving my business exactly like that car — rushing ahead, crashing projects, surviving, and then doing it all over again.
The message was clear: I had pushed slowness into the shadow. I had disowned rest, patience, consistency — seeing them as weaknesses rather than strengths. But when I began to invite “slow” back into my process, I found that it didn’t kill my drive — it actually made it sustainable.
How can you work with your shadow?
Below I have gathered a couple of examples on how you can start working with your shadow:
reflection exercise
bodily expresion
dreams
art, music and books
Reflection Exercise
If you love writing down things, take a pen and a notebook and journal on the following eight questions.
Notice emotional triggers and name them. What are they trying to tell you?
Take time to reflect:
What irritates you in others?
Instead of blaming them, turn it inward and ask: “How does this relate to me?”
Make a list of judgements you hold about other people:
Examples: “He’s so self-centered,” “She’s arrogant,” “They’re so unaware.”
Then turn it inward:
“Where do I exhibit the same traits that irritate me?”
“Why don’t I allow myself to openly express these traits/behaviors?”
What are you not allowing yourself to do / think / say?
Write down three traits that you are proud of
Then ask: “What is the opposite of each of these traits?”
Reflect: “Do I allow myself to be this opposite way? How would it feel to allow it?”
Remember what you were told as a child because some aspects of our shadow start long before adulthood.
Think about messages you received as a child, e.g., “Stop talking so much,” or “Don’t be so sensitive.”
These messages may have caused you to hide parts of yourself.
What makes you jealous?
How would you describe your worst self in 5 words?
Pause & Reflect
Read through your answers, then reflect:
What insights do you take away from your answers?
What patterns or connections do you notice more clearly now?
How can you integrate your shadow into your career and life?
Shadow lives in the body
You don’t always need analysis or words to connect with your shadow. The body itself carries memories, unspoken emotions, and parts of us we’ve hidden away.
Start by noticing:
Where do you feel tension?
Which areas feel heavy, tight, or numb?
Gentle practices like yoga, qi gong, breathwork, walking in nature, or free-form dancing can open a dialogue with your body. Sometimes, as you move or breathe, emotions will surface unexpectedly — even images or memories you thought were long forgotten.
The body can reveal what the mind has buried and show you the path toward integrating different aspects of yourself.
Dreams as a doorway to your shadow
If you’re into dreams like me, you’ll find they’re a rich source of hidden traits and beliefs. Our unconscious often speaks in symbols, and dreams can reveal the parts of ourselves we overlook or suppress in daily life.
My own daily practice is simple. I write down my dreams in the morning and then reflect on what the symbols could mean for me personally. A dream about running, for example, might not be about running itself but about the way I rush through life. A dream of being chased could reflect a part of myself I’m avoiding.
The key is not to look for a universal “dream dictionary” answer, but to ask: “What does this symbol mean to me, in my current life?”
If you’d like to start, I recommend keeping a dedicated notebook. Here’s my favourite dream journal: The Little Dream Journal.
Art, music and books
Art, music, and literature can be powerful guides into the shadow. They bypass the rational mind and speak directly to our emotions and memories. It often stirs what we’ve suppressed or forgotten.
The next time you stand in front of a painting, listen to a piece of music, or read a book, pause and notice:
What feelings are awakened in you?
What memories surface?
Which parts of you are touched, stirred, or even unsettled?
This awareness can open a doorway. Perhaps you feel longing, grief, envy, or even joy. These emotions point to aspects of yourself that want to be acknowledged. Ask yourself:
What part of me is being touched here?
What does this part of me need?
Is there a desire surfacing, and how can I express or live it out in a healthy way?
Art doesn’t just entertain us, it is a portal into inner world and psyche. Every strong emotional response is a chance to meet your shadow, reclaim your hidden desires, and integrate more of who you are.